Monday, November 2, 2009
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Use big words
Don't worry if you are not smart, people will think you are if you use a few big words in conversations which most people do not use.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Old and bills
Having a lot of bills if you are old at least gives you something to do each month, as you have write out checks all the time.
The best art
If you don't understand art don't worry. The best art are the paintings that you would think are not art.
Big butts
Don't worry if you have a big butt. It keeps you warmer in the winter, and you won't hurt as much if you sitting down for a long time.
Bad at math
It is best if you are not good at math. This way you won't realize that it is impossible to save $1 million dollars in your life.
Friday, August 28, 2009
Antique furniture
If your furniture is old and can't afford newer furniture, just say you like collecting antique furniture.
The smartest teachers
The smartest teachers in college are the ones who teach subjects you can't understand.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Older fashions are in
If you have no money for clothes, just wear your old clothes from 20 years ago and tell people the older fashions are now in.
Don't look good
If you think you don't look good don't worry, just go out in public and look at other people. You will feel better.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Height fear
Don't worry if you are afraid of heights. At least you will never be stuck in a roller coaster upside down.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Halloween teeth
Having bad teeth is great for Halloween. You will save money on not having to make your teeth look scary.
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Pay to be scared
Why pay to be scared on a roller coaster, when you can turn on the news and be scared for free?
Can't lose much
The best thing about not being rich is that you can't lose very much since you already have nothing.
Power of the remote
The TV remote is used so much by some people because that is as close as they will get to feel like they are in command of the Enterprise.
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Age and sitting down
You know you are getting older when sitting down on the toilet bowl is a workout.
Can't remember age
You are aging when you can't remember how old you are without thinking about it first.
Birthday candles and age
You are getting older when blowing out birthday cake candles feels like running a marathon.
Age and birthday candles
You know you are getting older when the birthday number candles don't go up as high as your age.
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Hard tax code
The tax code is hard to understand because if it was easy, everyone would be taking all deductions.
College fund
A college fund is great to start, until you realize you can't save enough money for even the cheapest colleges.
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